C F C/G e
C F C/G e
C F C/G e
C/G F C/G e

I met a Chomeless man named FRich
CIsn't that Gterrible?
I saw a Cflyer for a lostF dog
And the adog didn't have any leegs
I saw a Cdiabetic Fkid traick-or-Gtreating
I saCw a giraffe whoF had a short neck
aThat was sad,G or a deer

EI saw an Fold man get Chit by a Gtrain
He didn't Esee it in the pouring rFain
He didn't hCear me shout, "Look out for the tGrain!"    E 

Because I didn't say anything.

C F C/G e
CI justF thought C/Gto myself, "eOoh, this is gonna be sad."
C      F     C/GAnd it ewas.
C      FI'm aC/G geniuse.

I saw a Cman with only one eye   F 
CIn a 3D Gmovie
I saw a Clittle boy drop his ice crFeam cone
aDirectly on his mother's corpese
I saw a Ckitten stuck in a tFree
Then the akitten jumped off and he Ghung himself
I saw a boCy who had redF hair.  a        G 


EI went to a Fstore looking for Csomething to Gbuy
But they only sold paEintings of the same sad gFuy
No, Cwait--this store sells Gmirrors!
See what I Edid there?
Let's rock! No.C      e      F     f 



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C e F f)

The world's so sad, bros. Pain, genocide, war, sexism, racism. But I've gotta remember there's good things about it too. Like the fact that none of that's happening to me! Score! Still, though, it's hard not to be sad about it. How do y'all do it? I've been telling you guys terribly sad things this whole song; you
haven't been sad at all. You've been--you've been happy--no, you've been laughing. That's it, laughter, it's the key to everything. It's the way to solve all the sadness in the world! I mean not for the people that are actually sad, but the people like us that've gotta fucking deal with them all the time. Being a comedian isn't being an insensitive prick capitalizing on the most animalistic impulses of the public;
Cit's being a ehero.
F  The world isn't sad.G The world's funny! I'm a sociopath!

I saw an Cold man slip and fFall
aHey, what a fucking Gidiot
I saw a Cwoman at her daughter's Ffuneral
aHa ha ha. GClassic comedy.
CEverything that once was Fsad
aIs somehow Gfunny now
The HColocaust and F9/11
aThat shit's funny G24/7, cuz
ETragedy will be excFlusively jCoked abGout
Because my eEmpathy is bumming me Fout    C 
Goodbye, sGadness   E 
Hello jokeCs.    F     C/G      e      C